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About GospL ChurchAbout MeAbout the Series

God is not who you think He is. Church isn’t the way you think it is.

Join me in unraveling what it truly means to be a Christian.

People are used to relying on fraudulent, superficial behavior and trying to pass that off as integrity (legalism)…

… But God calls you to be the real deal and that means being honest about who you truly are with God, even when it hurts…

… Even when you want to pass the buck and make someone else pay for the things that bother you.

Humility is one of the rewards you get with God when you stop lying about what’s really beneath the surface, what’s really in your heart.

And people are used to lying about who they are, not realizing it will cost them their souls.

Learn how to live the way you were always meant to live with God. At optimum level, doing things you never thought you could do.

Telling the truth

… and becoming just like Jesus.

Living your dreams is always what God had in mind for you, but in order to do that, you have to admit who you truly are.

Are you strong enough to tell the truth?

God wants to show you how. Are you willing to learn?

Courses are available for free and for everyone!

Israel Mary Peniel

Born: March 4, 1978 Real Age?
Birthplace: Staunton, Virginia
Birth Name: Tameka Tamane Norris
Spiritual Gifts: Missions, Prophecy

Sins Gluttony, greed, lust, wrath, sloth, jealousy and pride.
If you would like to find out more about how God saved me from my sins, you can sign up to get notified when my web series God Makes Indie Movie airs.

The series centers around my life as a missionary and prophet and dives into my encounters with God and Satan. It begins when I meet the Holy Trinity and includes my testimony of rebellion as a sinner and how God redeems me.

Season one focuses on the seven deadly sins I’ve committed.

Subscribe to Get Notified When the Series Airs →

Bio

I was a very sensitive, shy child. I often kept to myself and struggled with social anxiety when speaking to others.

And I struggled with fitting in and finding a place in the world. Even at the age of five, I remember feeling out of place as if the physical world was a harsh and uncomfortable existence.

I spent most of my life overweight.

I developed a food addiction at the age of 9 or 10 and hid beneath a quiet and repressed facade.

But despite the fact that I was afraid of everything, there was always a small part of me that pushed me forward beyond my fears.

Looking back, I believe this was the Holy Ghost.

Read more...

It was in high school that I stepped outside of my comfort zone and took drama class. It was after I’d seen a school play that a part of me began yearning to express myself in stories.

But when I graduated high school I wasn’t able to pursue the dreams or career path that I wanted to take.

But the yearning to act and express myself through creative arts never left my soul.

Though it was muffled beneath a string of tedious 9 to 5 jobs.

All of which I hated.

And often my feelings would come out in my behavior. I struggled with showing up at work on a daily basis.

And because of this, I would often stop showing up at work without telling my employer anything. I would simply quit and never return again.

The truth was, I was terrified to tell them I hated the job, so I took the easy way out.

Because of my terrible childhood, I assumed that if I was honest with them they’d be angry and I just couldn’t stand the thought of that.

I didn’t know it at the time, but I was suffering from PTSD, which God later told me I had.

All I knew was, I wasn’t like everyone else. I couldn’t hold down a job. And I felt so ashamed.

I carried this shame around with me for years.

It took time, but I finally realized that my emotional development was about 10 years behind the average person’s because of my upbringing.

When people were marrying at 20 and having children, I was just getting started on what I wanted to do with my life.

But there was so much more to it than that.

I lived a reclusive and lonely life and it wasn’t until my late twenties that everything changed for me.

One day I woke up and I just couldn’t go back to my temp job at Victoria’s Secret. So I called in and quit.

I had done this so many times before. And no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t stop myself from doing it again.

Even in situations that were financially dangerous.

And this was one of them.

I had no idea how I was going to support myself. But I couldn’t stand the thought of going back.

I had no way of supporting myself but I hated the idea of moving back in with my mother. I wanted to experience life, not live with my mother for the rest of my life.

But I was a loser.

Pathetic.

Everyone in my family thought so and I was beginning to think they were right.

Lazy and a freeloader.

The thoughts haunted me.

I broke down in the middle of my living room floor and prayed to God to save me.

At the time, I had a poor relationship with God, but I was at my wits end. I didn’t know why I was so broken and couldn’t fix myself.

I knew the right way to respond to life and yet I was incapable of doing what I should do.

Why?

What was wrong with me?

Why couldn’t I be like everyone else?

“Please Lord, save me.” I was devastated. I had made so many mistakes. They seemed to be the staple of my life.

But there was this thing inside me that I couldn’t explain that made me believe that the life I had was not the life I was supposed to be living.

That there was something greater in store for me.

I knew that my life was supposed to be different, but I couldn’t seem to get to the place which it was.

Over and over again I repeated the same mistakes.

I was trapped in a cycle of fear and despair, wanting something better for my life but never knowing quite how to get it.

And whenever I tried I failed.

I was never going to escape this.

“I don’t know what to do. Please Lord, save me.” I burst into tears.

But little did I know, God heard me and He was going to answer my prayers.

Sometime back, I had built a small website just for the fun of it…

It was called Furniture for Small Spaces.

It consisted of about 10-15 pages.

And there was just something about the topic that excited me. So I hammered up a few pages, tossed some Google ads on them, and then ditched it.

It wasn’t until a few weeks later that I logged into Adsense to do something that I noticed I had earned money.

This was when the internet was still in its adolescent years and making money online was virtually unheard of.

Adsense had just launched and I had gotten wind of it through Ken Evoy who ran Sitesell.

I had learned to build websites when I was 21 through his website and from there I just kept growing and growing in my desire to create and build websites.

But after my failure with a little site called Simple Living Tips, I had given up. The site had only made me $200 over a two-year period.

After that, I felt it was time to move on to something else.

So, I moved from Winston-Salem, North Carolina to Columbus, Ohio.

I started working temp jobs to support myself, but the dream of something greater was like a drug I couldn’t quit.

I was always looking for a way out.

And I felt like there was a mark on my life. That I was destined for great things.

But when I built FFSS, it was simply having fun for a day.

I had no idea God would use the site to save me. That He would answer my prayers after that day that I sat on the living room floor and poured my guts out to Him.

What had scared me for many years was that I always knew I’d either be a truly great or a complete failure.

That I would be rich or homeless.

I felt there was little hope for me after that day on that living room floor. And that I would end up on the streets by my own hand someday.

I was just not able to cope with life like everyone else was and I would die a loser.

But then the miracles of God began…

When I saw that I had earned $30 in a month from Furniture for Small Spaces, hope budded within me.

I knew that I could build that site up to a full-time business and suddenly moving back in with my mother seemed like the best idea.

The plan was settled…

… I would go back to North Carolina, live with her and build the business up and once I made a full-time income I could move out again.

But before that happened my mother lost her job and called me and said she wanted to move in with me.

I was elated. I loved Columbus and although I knew it was wise to move back in with my mother, I didn’t want to leave.

And apparently, God didn’t want me to leave either.

Within a week or two, my mother had moved in with me and I asked her if she would consider supporting me again while I built the business up.

She said she didn’t mind. And over a year’s period of time, I was making a full-time income.

I’m not sure if I realized it immediately, but eventually, I came to understand God had saved me.

And I knew He’d saved me from a very bad fate.

After that, I went on to learn so many things about building websites.

For about five years I was able to run that e-business…

… Until one day God took it away.

At first, I thought it was a simple twist of fate until later I understood He took my ebusiness away because it had become an idol in my life.

It happened over a series of months. I watched as the money dropped and kept dropping.

I borrowed money from my sister to keep afloat.

At the time I was paying my mother’s rent. She lived in an apartment about 10 minutes away from me. But now, it would be impossible.

So, in the height of the decline, she moved back in with me.

Months carried on…

… And the money kept dropping.

To continue to support myself, I searched eLance, now known as Upwork, for freelance work I could do that would offset the financial loss.

Eventually, I saw a pattern in transcription work. I learned what I needed to know to get by and then applied for freelance work.

It would keep us afloat… at least for a little while.

I got jobs. My mother did transcription too and we got by as best as we could.

But things were getting worse and I knew it wouldn’t be long before I was unable to pay rent.

However, God had paved a way for us yet again.

My aunt had loved Columbus when she came to visit one Christmas and in several months’ time, she relocated here.

So my mother asked her if we could move in with her and Walter, her husband.

She said “yes.”

We moved in and kept transcribing. But it was poor pay and long, grueling hours, filled with many sleepless nights.

And in the middle of that struggle, what little hope I had was almost gone.

I saw the years stretching out before me doing 9 to 5 jobs that sucked the life out of me and all of my dreams running down the drain.

I sunk into a deep depression. It was the second-lowest moment in my life.

But I had one last attempt left.

Prior to that, I had come across a website that a guy was running. He’d been receiving crowdfunding support to support his dreams.

“Crowdfunding? What’s crowdfunding,” I said.

I did some research and the lights went off.

I had dreams. I needed funding. Was it possible?

Days passed by and I wracked my brain. I needed an amazing idea that would encompass everything I dreamed of in one neat, yet compelling package.

Over time Girl Makes Indie Movie was born.

GMIM was a web series that would chronicle my journey as a producer and aspiring actress.

I would build it from the ground up and fans could watch the making of the production company and movies that were made within it.

After they were engrossed in the real-life adventure, they’d then be able to watch the actual movies that were churned out from the web series.

It was brilliant!

So I launched it and built up a Twitter following using very spammy tactics. (I know, not cool!)

And then the day came. It was time to launch the crowdfunding campaign.

I was super excited…

… But I had a sense of dread in my spirit.

Despite the fact that I had hoped that it would work, I knew it would drop like a lead balloon.

People just didn’t believe in me. And I didn’t have a massive amount of friends, family or support to pull it off.

And it didn’t help that I didn’t know what I was doing.

So it tanked. Hard.

How embarrassing.

I got support from the small family that I did have but it was yet another thing I failed at.

But I knew that it was a great idea nonetheless. And after I’d begun GMIM, I loved the idea and also feared letting it go.

If I didn’t hold on to this one last dream, I would end up living like Joe in Joe Versus the Volcano.

Miserable.

Working at a desk day in and day out under hideous fluorescent lights.

I couldn’t give up. The alternative was unthinkable.

And even Joe eventually got out and ended up truly living.

And if Joe could do it, I could do it.

And like always, there was something greater inside me cheering me on. Leading me somewhere, but I didn’t know where.

The site floundered for about 3-4 more years and then one day God spoke to me.

“I want you to accuse yourself before the world,” He said.

“No Father, I can’t.”

And then He said something like, “As long as you have pride, you are in prison.”

Eventually, I consented. I knew what He wanted me to do. I had to tell the world about all of my sins. And that included the very embarrassing ones.

My sexual sins came to mind.

This was not going to be easy.

So, I prepared to do what He called me to do. Over a series of months, God the Father and God the Holy Ghost began to lead me in the direction I was supposed to go in.

“Testify,” leaped out at me one night as I pondered over my encounter with the Holy Trinity on Valentine’s Day 2016.

Several other encounters happened and then one day God spoke to me again.

“I would like to take control of the Girl Makes Indie Movie series,” He said.

After I understood what that meant, I was overjoyed.

After my encounters with God, I had become depressed, because they had changed me.

The world was no longer enough and I missed God. And I wanted to be with Him forever.

I had felt His holiness, power, and love.

And I couldn’t stand the thought of living the way I had before.

And I knew when He’d told me He wanted to take control of GMIM that meant that I would encounter Him again.

I would live for the next time I encountered God.

My eyes lit up and I jumped up out of the bed, excited. I would get to be in the presence of God again!

I couldn’t wait for that day to come.

Shortly after, I renamed the series God Makes Indie Movie.

It took another two years before I began building the mission. The devil had almost thwarted me, but eventually, God got me back on the right path.

In between the struggles, God revealed to me that I was a prophet.

I had learned at an early age that I was a missionary, but had long since forgotten about my calling as I slipped into a sinful and rebellious lifestyle.

But it had been this calling throughout the years that I had felt but couldn’t define–the certainty that I was meant to do something greater than what the world had in store for me.

It was only when God had intervened that I came to realize it.

Every dream I had been a clue to what God had called me to do. Every missed opportunity.

From missing out on the chance to learn music in the fifth grade. To losing out on a chance to take up acting or music in college. To the longing to dance in my twenties.

To wanting to launch a convent since I was a teen.

To taking up art in school but never quite having the passion for it. Always feeling like something was missing.

All of them were breadcrumbs, leading up to what God had in store for me and how He wanted to use the gifts He gave me to save me, others and to glorify Him so that He could spend eternity with us.

Family eternal…

And like many of the people, God often chose for leadership positions, I wasn’t the “candidate” the world would choose.

I had more strikes against me than in my favor. But He loved me anyway and said I had worth in Him.

Encountering God had been one of the most special moments of life.

He changed the course of my life and I would never be the same.

He changed me from someone with deep shame and worthlessness to someone who is learning how to love herself and others.

From someone who was certain to end up on the streets to someone with a purpose and calling that surpasses this world.

He changed me from someone who felt too ugly to love to someone who knows that she’s loved.

My entire life I’ve long for a best friend that I could talk to and confide in, that I could bear my soul to, tell my deepest desires to and my darkest fears.

A friend that would love me no matter what. A friend that would stay loyal to me through thick and thin…

… Little did I know that that friend would be God.

Missions

Spiritual Trademarks
The last prophet – Matthew 24:42-44
Creative arts ministry – 1 Corinthians 12:7-11, Romans 12:6-8
Testifying – Psalm 40:9-10
Accuse myself of my sins before the world – James 5:16

Weaknesses
Traitor A tendency to betray God like Saul and Judas Iscariot. – 1 Samuel 15:10-11, Matthew 26:21
Anger A lack of faith in the Lord which leads to rage. – Psalm 37:8

Testimonies

God gave me a new name (Israel Peniel) from Genesis 32:28-31. He later told me He gave me a new name because the new name symbolized my transformation from being a rebellious sinner to a righteous servant. Though I still struggle with sin from time to time, I’m now committed to turning away from it and giving God first place in my life. Whereas, before I embraced my sins and lived life as my own god.
When I was 17, I was miserable and was convinced I was better off dead than alive. I just wanted to make the aching stop, so one day I hit a pharmacy and bought two bottles of sleeping pills. I took about a bottle and a half of them and went to bed. Hours later I woke up convicted and terrified I would burn in Hell. “I’m sorry,” I said to God. “Please don’t let me die.” I went back to sleep shortly after, even though I knew that was the last thing you should do since it could lead to my heart-stopping. But God saved me. It took most of the next day for the pills to wear off, but I lived and never tried that again. I didn’t really want to die. I just wanted the hurting to stop. I hung in there and it took years but life eventually got better. I always look back on that day, knowing that Hell was exactly where I would’ve ended up. I had a food addiction problem at the time and God was not the first place in my life and had I killed myself I would’ve lost my eternal life for trying to play god of my own life, for both the food addiction and suicide. (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)
I was driving home from work in my sister’s truck and it had been raining hard. And just as I was jumping off an exit and onto the interstate, I got the knowledge in my spirit to pray to God to keep me safe. I had a bad feeling and felt like I might have an accident. My sister’s truck was known for not being very reliable. That and the weather made a perfect storm. Just seconds after I prayed, I hit a puddle and hydroplaned across the interstate. Thanks to God there was no traffic when I had come off the interstate. It was like He had parted the traffic like the Red Sea (Exodus 14:21-22). I knew God had saved me. It took me hours to get home but I was so grateful to God that I had walked away with no injuries. I’ll never forget that day. I later found out I was not saved at that time, because my gluttony was my false god. So I’ve always been grateful to God for saving me from eternal death as well as saving my life.
I was in my late 20s, sitting on the Tube in England. I was there visiting my boyfriend at the time. After years of waiting, I’d decided that I was going to give my boyfriend my virginity. I’d felt that I’d never lived life and I finally wanted to know what it was like. And then the Holy Ghost began to appeal to me. I remember seeing a sign on the Tube that said “Trust Alpha” and I knew God was talking to me. He appealed to me not to do it, but I said, “No God, I want to know what it’s like.” I had spent my whole life feeling like I was on the sidelines. He tried everything He could to get me to stop but I was adamant. I didn’t trust God and didn’t think I’d ever had the opportunity again. After all, men didn’t pay attention to women like me. And I really loved my boyfriend. I justified it at that time even though I knew it was wrong.

Several months later my boyfriend and I broke up, but it took 10 years before I regretted my choice to have sex with him. After I began to have an intimate relationship with God in my mid-thirties, I realized how detrimental my mistake was and how a sexual relationship should only be ordained between a husband and a wife. It was in my dining room that I cried out to God one day and reaffirmed the convictions I’d begun to have years earlier. That I would never touch another man again unless it was the man God had ordained me to marry. And if that meant I’d have to go my entire life single, then so be it. I would trust God to choose my partner for me. I wouldn’t choose for myself as I’d done with my boyfriend. And I would stay celibate… for life if that’s what it took. But whatever the case, I’d give God my total trust. (1 Corinthians 6:18)

Months after I visited my boyfriend in England, we struggled to make our relationship work. I originally sought out a Christian in a Christian forum and found him online. We started off as friends, but somewhere between it all, he struggled with believing God existed and eventually became an agnostic. This led to many conversations and disagreements about God and ultimately it strained our relationship that it became futile to stay together. So we broke up. I had originally ended it, but during a moment of desperation, I tried to get him back. But he turned me down. I was devastated. I couldn’t imagine life without him. For six long years we’d been together and I’d given him everything. My first kiss, my first everything. How was I going to go on without him? And there was the despairing feeling that I would end up single for the rest of my life. That he would be my first and last love.

I was convinced I would always be alone. I wasn’t beautiful and he was the first one who had shown interest in me that I was actually interested in as well. I was crushed. It was during all of this that God spoke to me. “I’m hardening his heart so that I can tear him away from you,” God said. After that, I spent a year or two struggling with so much grief I thought I’d never get over it. It began to wear off but for about six years I struggled with recovering from that broken relationship. After that, I declared I would never get in another relationship again unless God chose my partner for me. I could not and would not ever go through that again.

It wasn’t until I was in my early 40s that I praised God with all my heart, thanking him from the bottom of my soul for tearing my boyfriend away from me. I had been grateful for many things in my life and this would be counted among them. My boyfriend and I would have never stayed together and I would have been miserable married to him– if he ever chose to marry me. In which case, that was unlikely since he was adamant about the fact that he thought marriage was unnecessary. I still praise God to this day for saving me from a horrible relationship. I still speak to my boyfriend from time to time. There’s nothing but good feelings between us and I consider him one of the best men I’ve ever met, but we would never be right for each other even if he someday gave his life to God.

One of my favorite movies is Anne of Avonlea. It was the beginning of my lifelong love affair with historical romances. As I grew up, I fell in love with them and wanted to live inside the pages of romance novels and movies. God gave me my heart’s desire by making that a part of my missionary work. My first movie will be Admittance. It’s a story about a woman who’s married employer falls in love with her. The tension arises between Jane’s desire to be loyal to God and do what is right against her ache to be with Henry and take the selfish path. It examines true love and the often overlooked struggle beneath it. The movie poses the question, “Am I willing to sacrifice everything I’ve ever wanted and trust God, even if it means giving up the person I love the most?”

The Holy Ghost told me I was a missionary when I was in my early teens. Along the lines of 13-14 years old. Later he confirmed it through a prophet at church when I was 23 years old. God didn’t reveal He called me to be a prophet until much later. He began revealing to me I was a prophet in 2016. You can watch my story as a prophet in the God Makes Indie Movie series in which God calls me to step out on faith as He assigns me bold missions.

I’ve loved watching sports drama for as long as I can remember. One of my favorite movies is “Warrior.” I later came to find out that God wants me to train in mixed martial arts. Over the last few years, God has made it very clear that every dream and desire I’ve had is a part of His calling for me to point the way to Christ.
Just about every movie that God called me to write includes hidden prophecies about my own life in them. I later discovered this when He began to reveal things about my future to me. He’d had me writing prophecies about my own life for the last 20 years and I didn’t know it.
The Holy Trinity spoke to me in a dream on Valentine’s day 2016 after I refused to go back to church. Shortly after I refused, God rebuked me. I was so embarrassed and distraught by the correction, He was kind enough to console me as He provided further insight into my pride and prejudices in the dream.
God told me He wanted to take control of the God Makes Indie Movie series. The series was originally titled, Girl Makes Indie Movie. It was meant to chronicle my journey of acting and launch as a producer in indie filmmaking. Though the series had a similar name to its original title, the plot changed once God revealed He wanted me to use the series to chronicle my life as a sinner, as well as a missionary and prophet for Him. The original plot of GMIM was then shifted to The Making of GospL Productions web series several years later. However, now the production company and my journey would no longer be used to fuel my self-centered dreams. Instead, it would be used to glorify God and point the way to Christ Jesus as our Lord and Savior.
God revealed that He wanted to utilize every selfish dream I had for His glory. In return, He made them greater than I could’ve ever imagined. I had been in the midst of setting up several websites. All of them were things I’d dreamt of. I finally wanted to take the plunge. My dreams had been on the backburner for too long and it was time to make a move.

My first attempt was Girl Makes Indie Movie, which was a complete failure, but I’d decided not to give up. And so, I continued to work on it, despite the fact that I felt in over my head. The second one was titled, Tameka’s Music, and it was going to chronicle my journey of learning how to sing. But the songs would have had nothing to do with God. I would simply do cover songs, write my own music and learn how to play the piano. This would all be a part of my self-centered adventure.

Also, I was just about to start a dance series in which I chronicled my journey of learning how to dance. Once again, all about me. Not to mention, the dancing I would have done would have pointed the way to musicians whom God didn’t approve of. And lastly, I had worked hard on a site titled, Overeaters’ Workbook. It focused on helping people overcome their food addiction. However, part of that approach not only trivialized gluttony, but it helped them set up idols and false gods as steps toward recovering from their food addiction. (Exodus 20:3)

That’s when God intercepted me. At the time, I didn’t realize I was doing such evil things. They all seemed like me simply living my life. But they were all self-centered approaches that taught other people to be godless. They reaffirmed the lust of being your own god and living life your own way. They would’ve taught others how to reject God and live a life of sin. It wasn’t until God called me to use those talents and abilities He gave me for His purpose that I later realized the evil that I had been just about to do.

It took several years after the start of GMIM, but the truth finally sunk in. All of those things I was going to do were talents, gifts, and desires God had placed in my heart and gave me the ability to do specifically for Him. The Holy Ghost had given me these gifts all along for the sole purpose of worshiping God. But I had perverted them and turned them into worldly, self-centered, ego-boosting efforts.

But thankfully God got a hold of me in time and used my evil intentions for good. Girl Makes Indie Movie became God Makes Indie Movie. Tameka’s Music became I Sing for God. The unnamed dance site became I Dance for God. And Overeaters’ Workbook became Food Addiction Cooking Channel.

And now they all glorify our kind and most loving Creator, Confidant, and Savior rather than introducing others into idol worship and self-deification.

Little did I know at the time that my ideas were pathetic compared to what God had in store for me. I thought the contrived, formulaic ideas I had in mind were really something… until God started revealing how He wanted me to tell the story. Then, I realized just how blessed I was that He stepped in and saved me from myself… and others along with it. His “imagination” is surprising and understated. And the Holy Ghost will give you ideas and ingenious ability beyond what you would ever think was possible. So many times I’ve witnessed how limited my imagination and abilities were compared to God’s that it’s now a private joke I laugh about with the Lord.

Strengths
Compassion A hyper-sensitivity toward the plight of others. – Luke 10:30-35
Child-Like A playfulness and desire to always have fun with God. – Mark 10:13-16

Divine Encounters
Due to extreme myopia, I suffered from retinal tearing that could cause blindness. However, God healed it. This was discovered later by a doctor after the tearing had healed.
Due to my calling, I often sleep for only 4 hours six days a week and catch up on some of my rest on Sabbath Rest days. As a result, the Holy Ghost wakes me up if I sleep too long. He will lightly nudge me awake in most cases. In rarer cases, it’s more like he’s shaking me awake. He will usually shake my hand, leg, or nudge my shoulder.
I was trained by God through the Bible. He would have me flip through pages of the Bible to tell me specific prophecies, prepare me for a leadership position and train me to sleep and work according to His will. He would open up the Bible on certain pages and if He didn’t have anything to say, He would not allow me to open it. In the beginning, for a short season, I also heard the Holy Ghost tell me to open my Bible whenever God called me to open it so that He could train me and speak to me through it.
God spoke to me a few days later after He saved me from a demonic attack from Lucifer (see below). He confided in me and told me he removed a person from my life that would’ve likely done me and those around me great harm. He also told me He loved me over and over again. That was when I discovered God’s child-like qualities and realized the connection between His personality and the beautiful Bible verse, “Become like little children.” (Matthew 18:3) He spoke, in many ways, like a little child and yet at the same time like an adult. He said things I wouldn’t have expected and in ways, I wouldn’t have expected. He was both my friend and my God. Even though He is with me, I still miss Him after He spoke to me that day.
After overeating one morning, I was down in my basement feeling lost. I felt so grieved about my life and just didn’t know how to feel better. “Oh, God,” I prayed and burst into tears. Then as I was going up the steps a few minutes later after some of the grief had passed, though still feeling low, God said, “No amount of food could ever take my place.” I said, “I know, Lord. I know.” It was true. No matter how convinced I was that the next meal would make me feel better, make me happy or fill the gaping hole in my soul, it never could. I’d lusted after food most of my life and all it did was add on to my grief. All it did was add to my sorrows. Later, that morning I’d reconciled myself to no longer return to my food addiction in the same way I gave up my sexual sins when God wanted to save me. It was time to stop making excuses and give it up for good.

Demonic Encounters
After I disobeyed God through divination, He punished me. Though I was already demonically possessed due to my food addiction, I was not aware of it. I only become aware of it when I one day heard the demon’s voice. It was when I dove into the occult without realizing it that I ended up hearing and speaking to Lucifer (not to be confused with Satan). He does a very convincing impersonation of God and fooled me into believing He was God. He terrorized me for about 1 1/2 to 2 months. After it was over, I was terrified of the dark. God eventually saved me and I was able to rebuke Lucifer. It took months before I recovered from my fear of the dark.

Personal Quotes
When you hide the sin, you hide the Savior. When you expose the sin, you expose the Savior.
I see what you mean about sin, Lord. There’s a lot of sin that seems harmless–innocent, like it won’t hurt anybody, but it does. It changes people’s opinions of things. And all you have to do is imagine how it would be if everybody did it. It’s pretty easy to see how devastating it is then.
People often confuse what feels natural with what is right.
Everybody has their idea of what is good. Some people think it’s okay to overeat. Some people think it’s okay to cheat on their spouses. Some people even think it’s okay to murder, rape or steal. But everyone can’t be right. You can’t have different versions of the truth (John 14:6). There’s only one truth. And there’s always a source. I think if more people realized that, they wouldn’t be so easily deceived.
We have enough people who pretend to be something they’re not, who feel pressured and stressed to behave a certain way and to look a certain way, and it stands in their way.
Sin starts off seeming innocently enough.
The devil takes it away but You [Lord] give it back to me.
That’s the problem with sin, it promises to sate but it only consumes.
God is the only one who is truly self-sufficient.

God’s Quotes
Don’t chase after good opinions.
The seed gets in deep. You have to dig it out from the root. That is the only way to remove it.

Covenants
Worldwide fame promised to me by God. – Psalm 89:24

Warm Regards,

P.S. If you’d like to find out more about me, read more of my testimonies and find out more about my other missionary work, you can check out IsraelPeniel.site

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